The Bates Family

He's finally here!!!

2011-07-26T17:29:00.003-06:00

He's finally here!!! Riggs Kirt Bates. He weighed 7 lbs even and was 19 inches even. My pregnancy with him couldn't have been easier and the delivery was the same way! It all went so perfectly! After we had him, he was having breathing problems and blood sugar problems so he spent his first night in the NICU which was a little nerve racking but thank heavens for modern medicine! He was back in our room the next day. He is the best baby! He is so sweet!! We love him so much and he has been such a blessing to our family!

My mom
Eric's mom

Eric's dad

Down in the NICU

My baby turned 8!!

2011-07-26T17:07:00.003-06:00

She got her ears pierced and I stole this idea from a friend of mine. She was so excited to see all those earings!

Miranda Cosgrove!!

A DS?!

????

Mmmmm...not sure...
Friends at the Outer Limits Fun Park

Where does time go?!

Jackson Hole

2011-07-26T16:39:00.003-06:00

We decided that we needed a quick vacation before the baby came and I was going stir crazy so we planned a 3 day trip to Jackson Hole, WY. Also, we promised Rohbi that we would do something special when she finished her schooling because she worked so hard to get it finished before the baby came. We didn't really do anything special. Rohbi earned some money special for this trip so we did some shopping, went to see the elk, and did a little swimming. Yeah I know we are boring but it was just nice to be able to just get out of Caribou County.

I swear I took more pictures than this but apparently not...darn!

A few things I've realized...

2011-02-28T11:42:00.003-07:00

Losing two babies back to back was such a hard thing to go through. Eric and I had been married 2 months when we found out we were pregnant with Gunnar and we were so excited. A few months later the wind was taken out of our sails when we lost him. Nine months later we were pregnant again and we went through the same process of grief when we lost Ruger. Nine months later again when we found out we were pregnant with this little boy, we were both nervous and anxious but in a way, I was hoping that by carrying this pregnancy to term, maybe it would take away the pain of losing our other two boys. I was hoping it would fill that void that was left and numb the ache I felt to hold Gunnar and Ruger. For about the first 6 months of this pregnancy I was on cloud nine and with every hurdle we cleared I became more and more excited. Now that I've had time to come back to reality, I'm realizing that I still ache to hold Gunnar and Ruger (and yes it is a physical ache). Leaving the hospital both times without my babies was the worst feeling. My arms ached to hold my boys.

Even though I still miss my boys and ache to hold them, being pregnant with this little one has helped to dull that ache. He has given me something to look forward to. I look forward to holding him and kissing him and smelling him. I look forward to watching him grow and helping him learn...He has been my light at the end of the tunnel.

I love all of my kids so much! I'm so grateful to be able to say that I have an eternal family and I will get a chance to raise Gunnar and Ruger during the millennium if I live my life right. It gives me something positive to work on!

Belly pictures

2011-02-26T10:32:00.009-07:00

I decided I wanted to celebrate this pregnancy. We've waited a couple of years for a healthy pregnancy so it's been exciting to get this far along! A friend from our ward told me that she would do the pictures for me because she is wanting to get into photography and could use the practice. I think she did such a great job! I wish I would have done this 8 years ago with Rohbi but I had never seen this done until the last few years or so. I also wish I had had the opportunity to do this with Gunnar and Ruger. I realize I put this on Facebook but I do have some people who follow our blog who are not on Facebook. We have all been so excited about this pregnancy and the further along I got the more hopeful we got. This pregnancy has been amazing!! I haven't had a lot of nausea, the baby has been healthy and strong and VERY active! People ask me if I'm ready to be done with it yet. Honestly, no. I'm not that uncomfortable yet. I have enjoyed every minute of this pregnancy! I am eager to meet this little boy but I guess in a selfish way, I still want a little bit more time to just spend with him before I have to share with everyone else. :) I love this little boy so much!!! Rohbi has wanted to be involved with this pregnancy from the minute she found out that I was pregnant and when we found out that we were having a boy, she has wanted to be involved in choosing the name. She has decided that we should name him Copper Kirt Bates. I'm not sure I'm too excited about this name but we'll pretend, for her sake, that we are taking it into consideration. :)

At my last doctor's appointment I had an ultrasound and he measured big. I am at 33 weeks right not and his head measured at 36 weeks, the rest of him measured at 35 weeks, and the estimated his weight to be at around 5 pounds. I realize there is room for error when they do measurements on an ultrasound but I'm kinda freaked out! lol The tech told me that if he grows like he's supposed to, he could weigh over 9 pounds when he is born! Yikes!!! Rohbi was 8lbs 10oz so it couldn't be too much worse could it?

Anyway, as usual, this post is going to be picture heavy. I guess all the pictures just show how indecisive I am :) I am going to print out a few of these pictures and hang them in his room so if you have any suggestions or favorites, let me know! Please don't mind all the weight I've put on and all the stretch marks I have...just enjoy the pictures! :) Okay enough of my blabbering...

I'm finally caught up!!!

2011-02-22T19:46:00.002-07:00

I spent all day doing it but I'm all caught up! So here they go in order:

Our trip to Arizona (it is an older post because I started on it and didn't finish it so you might have to look a little for it)
Rohbi's birthday
Spring 2010 Dance Recital
Girls' Weekend 2010
4th of July
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
Haloween 2010
Fun in the Snow
A few projects I've done recently
Bath time for the kitties
Tavaci Christmas Concert
We are an eternal family!
Christmas 2010
Winter Dance Recital 2011
Holy moly! We've been invaded by canning jars!!!

Holy moly!!! We've been invaded by canning jars!!!

2011-02-22T19:37:00.005-07:00

Eric has a friend who recently lost his mom. He asked Eric if he would help him clean out his mom and dad's house up in Twin. In the process of cleaning out the house they cleaned out their food storage and Gary graciously let Eric take some of the jars. Eric came home with the back of his truck PACKED with canning jars. And that was only a portion of the jars. Gary and his family still got a trailer full and there were still jars left at the house. Thank you so much Gary! We really appreciate it!

Don't mind the mess on our counter...we are still trying to get some of the jars cleaned out and ran through the dishwasher!

These were all filled to the top with jars

Izzy is helping count the jars :)

And this is still only a portion of what we got! We have some in the dishwasher, some in our mud room and at least 8 more boxes out in our garage!!!

Winter Dance Recital 2011

2011-02-22T19:25:00.003-07:00

I was hoping to get some more pictures but of course my camera died! Rohbi did such a great job! I was so proud of her!!

Christmas 2010

2011-02-22T19:04:00.003-07:00

She was feeling around in her stocking and felt something big. She thought it was a huge piece of candy and was disappointed to find out that it was an orange! lol We all got a little spoiled this year!

She finally got her American Girl Doll!!!

She was so excited!!!!!

Every year I trust that Eric is only going to get me a small present if he gets me anything at all. We already pretty much have everything we both need so we just end up getting each other something small but meaningful. This year all I asked for from him was a new knife set. Well, I did get that and thought that was all I was going to get. After we finished opening all the presents, Eric tells me that there is one more gift under the tree for me. I was ready to kill him because he wasn't supposed to get me anything else. So I start opening the gift and open a box and find a flat, black box. I open the box and inside is a PINK 38!!!!! I was so excited I screamed! I felt so bad though because all I got him was a plaque I got made that has his priesthood line of authority. Even though it is meaningful, I felt like I didn't get him as good of a gift as he got me. He's so good to me!

We are an eternal family!

2011-02-22T18:55:00.003-07:00

December 18, 2010 we were sealed together for time and all eternity! It was one of the most overwhelming, rewarding, emotional days of my life. I am so thankful that we finally made it! We had friends and family who had a ways to travel and some who didn't have to travel very far but we were so grateful to have them there and share this wonderful day with us!

Oh my child...sometimes I wonder where she came from. Here we are trying to get a nice family picture taken and she has to throw this in! What a ham!

Tavaci Christmas concert 2010

2011-02-22T18:19:00.005-07:00

K'Lyn Thomas put together a group this year called Tavaci. She asked me to help out and it has been so fun!!! Rohbi has been involved and has loved every minute of it!!

Getting ready before the concert...showing a little baby bump! :) Rohbi's group

The younger group. They were so cute!
Specialty numbers

Tavaci cheer routine

What do you think is going through her mind? lol

K'Lyn the director (yes she is pregnant too and due 3 weeks before me so it should be interesting to see how things work when it comes time to have our babies!)

Bath time for the kitties

2011-02-22T18:11:00.004-07:00

Izzy was getting really stinky from playing too hard with her sister and stuff so we decided she needed a bath. Eric also can't stand that our cats shed so he got the idea to throw the cats in the bath too. I was a little apprehensive because Indy can be a fiesty cat and has actually bit my had right to the bone when he was scared so I was scared as to how this was going to go. It actually went quite smoothly. Poor cats hated every second of it!

This is the only picture I got of Zoe because she kept running away from me but she dried off pretty quickly since she doesn't have very long fur.

Indy on the other hand has really long fur and it took him forever to dry off. After he got a majority of the water licked off, he came and layed on me and shivered. He couldn't get warm...poor thing. He looked like a drowned rat!

A few projects I've done recently

2011-02-22T17:59:00.004-07:00

This will be the extent of my knitting for a while I think. I've been so busy with homeschooling and then being pregnant, I haven't had the patience to sit down and do a lot of knitting. I did to a bunch of knitting for Christmas.

A friend of mine had a baby about a year ago and I made this for them when they had her. They ended up using it for her blessing dress. I was so flattered. I also made an identical one for my great-niece for Christmas in a different color. She looks adorable in it! Instead of a bonnet, I made a little headband for her.

The whole outfit

For Christmas, I made this for two of my nieces. I loved the pattern! It turned out so cute and I want to make one for me so badly, just haven't taken the time to do it!

Fun in the snow

2011-02-22T17:50:00.002-07:00

Every year, Eric tries to get a tube hooked up to his 4-wheeler and takes Rohbi out in the snow. This was the first real good snow of the year.

Yes, Rohbi is under all the snow somewhere
Izzy had to get in on the fun too!

Halloween 2010

2011-02-22T17:41:00.003-07:00

This year for Halloween Rohbi decided she wanted to be a Vampire Bride. Why she chose that, I don't know. Usually she choses something girly but she chose it so that's the direction we went! I think it turned out really cute!

We usually go to the Trunk or Treat in Soda and then head on over to the nursing home and then hit a few houses of people we know to trick or treat at. This year we ended up not being able to do that because Eric's grandpa passed away so we had to head over to Boise for the funeral. We were able to make it to the Halloween carnival that is held at the elementary school and as usual, Eric and Rohbi had the time of their lives. I swear Eric looks forward to it more every year than Rohbi does.

Extreme Makeover: Home Edition

2011-02-22T17:18:00.004-07:00

We got some money back from our taxes and then we got the tax credit from buying a new house so we decided to put it to use. I think the project may have been a little bigger than Eric expected because it still isn't finished. We tore out a bunch of shrubs last year just after we bought the house. This summer we decided to put a deck on and re-side the house.

The cement for the front porch was so hard that Eric couldn't get through it just using a jack hammer so we had to ask someone with a backhoe that had a stinger on it to finish off the job. It shook the whole house and upset the dog and freaked out the cats!

The beginning...

Our wonderful friend Seth came to help out. We couldn't have done this without him! Eric didn't completely know what he was doing and Seth came over and helped design the deck and get us well on our way before he had to leave! We owe him so much for helping out!

He looks so happy!

Like I said, we are still not finished. The deck is mostly finished. Before the snow fell, Eric tore off all the siding and that's how our house sits now. We don't have the new siding on yet but I'm so excited to see what it will look like when it is finished!

4th of July

2011-02-22T16:52:00.003-07:00

We got invited over to some friends' house for the 4th this year and had a bbq and played couples Minute to Win it. Then they let off some fireworks. It was so much fun to just get together and have some fun even if we did make fools out ourselves playing the game!

I think there was a penny at the end of the panty hose and we had to get it without using the help of the other hand.

Kim go a hold of my camera.

We had to blow a feather up in the air and keep it floating for 1 minute

We had to pick up the paper bags with our mouths without using our hands...quite a challenge but I have to say I totally dominated this round!Haha Liz!!!

Girls' Weekend 2010--San Diego, CA!!!!

2011-02-22T15:11:00.009-07:00

So this year for our annual "Girls' Weekend" with my roommates from Pocatello, we decided to go to San Diego, CA. We had so much fun. My camera died like the first day and I brought two extra batteries but my camera needs four so I didn't get half the pictures I wanted. Oh well. We had so much fun.

We went to a nearby outdoor shopping area that had a ton of little shops, places to eat, etc. This guy was there.

We went on a SEAL tour. This thing drove on the street but it also goes in the water (I can't remember what it's called...an amphibious vehicle or something like that maybe?) We went out and saw all sorts of sea lions and stuff.

Our captain and his 1st mate

Me, Jayne Ann (in blue), and Jennifer (in brown)

A submarine coming up out of the water. There was a Naval base close by.

Tyler--our tour guide...he was a little odd...

It looked like it was posing for us
Local drug smugglers :) They were actually probably just unloading or something but I thought Eric would appreciate this picture

Our little friend

A dolphin at the Naval base. They use the dolphins to help them and I can't remember what for but this is where they keep them and train them.
He kept following us around and wouldn't leave us alone until I took a picture with him ;) haha
Sea World
Shamu--this was one of the coolest shows I've ever seen! It was awesome!

Waving "hi"

A bird trying to get to Shamu's food!

Splashing the crowd

The sharks were swimming above us. We were in a tunnel. Kinda freaky but really cool!

Penguins!!

We also went to the beach, to a movie "Letters to Juliet", shopping, and just relaxed! We also got to watch the local police arrest drunk drivers and whatever else they were looking for. They set up a little detour right outside our hotel so we ate dinner and watched that for a while. Small town girls getting entertainment from that!

Spring 2010 Dance Recital

2011-02-22T14:47:00.006-07:00

Rohbi "posing" :)
Cheer routine

Ballet routine

Everyone coming out to take a bow (and yes Rohbi's pants are on backwards lol. I don't know who helped her get dressed after her ballet routine but they didn't pay too much attention to what they were doing!)

Rohbi's birthday (last year 7th)

2011-02-22T14:08:00.004-07:00

While we were in Arizona Rohbi had a birthday. Since we were driving on her birthday, we decided to have her open presents while we were there with Eric's parents. We did have a few more birthday parties when we got home.

Grammy was kind enough to make her a cake.

We had Rohbi's Grandma and Grandpa Gould up for dinner and then they gave her a few presents. She loves spending time with her grandparents!

I was crazy enough to let her invite all the girls in her class over for a fun dress up party. Holy craziness!!!!! This is the cake I made. It was supposed to be standing up but it fell and that's where it stayed. Not the best but it tasted good and Rohbi loved it!

Silly girls!

Happy Birthday Ruger (part 2)

2010-11-08T15:04:00.002-07:00

We were given the option to head home and get things situated at home and come back the next day or just head straight up to L&D and get induced that day. We chose to go in that day. There was no way I could have made it through having to go home and come back the next day. It was more than I could handle. Rohbi had a Halloween carnival that night and we knew we were going to miss it. We were so upset because we had promised her we would go as a family. Once we got up to the room and situated (me hooked up to an IV and pumped full of meds, an epidural put in, and the induction meds started), your dad made the dreaded phone calls. That’s always the hardest part. After he got off the phone with my mom, she made arrangements with my sister, Andrea, to take Rohbi to the carnival. She already had her hands full with her four kids (one set of twins) but we were so thankful that she was so willing to help and make things seem normal for Rohbi. We had decided to have an amniocentesis done to see if they could determine why this kept happening. They hooked me up to another ultrasound machine and stuck a needle into my stomach and into the amniotic sack. I don’t handle needles well at all and I don’t think I breathed at all during the procedure. Right away the doctor could tell that things weren’t quite right just by the color of the amniotic fluid. The epidural didn’t work very well and I felt almost everything. Gradually the labor got worse. I didn’t get very much sleep because the blood pressure monitor alarm kept going off every 30 minutes when it took my blood pressure because my blood pressure was way too low. It took almost two days for things to progress fully. By early Saturday morning, I had them take the epidural out because it was hurting my back really bad and it wasn’t working at all. Just before 12:55 Saturday morning, my water broke and I delivered you shortly after that at 12:55 am. I bled a lot and because I didn’t have the epidural in anymore, they had to take me into surgery to put me under for a D&C and a blood transfusion. When they put me under for the D&C, they had to put a tube down my throat. I remember waking up from surgery and my throat hurt so badly. I was so groggy and out of it but I remember all I wanted was your dad. I needed him. Finally he came in and among all the confusion, I finally felt safe. I didn’t find out before they put me under whether we had a boy or girl so when he came in I found out we had another boy! We had your name picked out way before you were born so as soon as you came out and your dad saw you were a boy, he named you Ruger. After I came out of recovery and finished with the blood transfusion, I was able to hold you. You were a little underdeveloped but you were perfect.

We decided that we would have a funeral this time and that we would put your name and Gunnar's name on the headstone so we had one place to visit both of you. Your dad made all the arrangements. I don't think I could have done it and I appreciate him so much for taking care of that. We had a small grave side service with family and friends. The drive to Logan to finish up all the details was the hardest, longest, and worst drive to Logan I have ever had. I dreaded your funeral so much. My heart ached knowing that we would be burying you instead of having you safe and happy at home. You are in the perfect place though. I love to go to Baby Land to visit you and your brother. It's such a peaceful place! Grandpa Bates said the opening prayer, Bishop Simonson conducted the service, I read a couple of poems, and Grandpa Larson dedicated the grave. It was a very short service but it was just fine.

It broke my heart that you left us so soon but you were so perfect and Heavenly Father needed you with him more than he needed you on Earth. We miss you so much! I'm getting to the point where I'm coping better with losing you but there are times where I miss you and your brother so much and ache to hold you. I love you so much baby boy! Take care of your big brother and this new little brother or sister that I am carrying.

Love,
Mom

Happy Birthday Ruger! (part 1)

2010-11-08T13:16:00.003-07:00

I'm a little slow at getting this up. We've had a pretty eventful few weeks. Ruger's birthday was October 31st but we were in Boise for Eric's grandpa's funeral. I haven't had a chance to get this letter posted until now. Between homeschooling, the funeral, and me being sick, things have been pretty crazy around our house! Anyway, this letter is more for my benefit than anyone else's so feel free to skip this post if you want to. I just needed to get these thoughts off my mind on onto "paper". Sorry in advance it is so long...

Dear Ruger,

My sweet baby boy...I can't believe it's been a year already. This time of year is the hardest for me because we lost your brother in September and then a year later, we got the news that we had lost you also.

When we found out that I was pregnant with you, we were so excited but at the same time, so scared. It was in July and I had been in Wyoming with Rohbi visiting some friends. I felt so nauseated the whole way home and for quite a while after we got home. I thought it was maybe car sickness or something because I was knitting with my head down while we were driving through a canyon with a lot of curves in the road. After a trip to the bathroom thinking I was going to puke, it dawned on me that I was late. So I took a pregnancy test and to my surprise it was positive! I was not expecting it at all! I wanted so badly to call your dad but he had just been called out on a really bad accident so I knew he wasn't going to be able to talk and I didn't want to tell him over the phone. I texted him and told him if I was asleep when he got home for dinner that he needed to wake me up. I needed to talk to him. He knew then what my news was going to be. As the pregnancy progressed, I was sick as usual but everything went so smoothly. We bought a house in August and I had fun getting things set up to make it a home. The move was a little stressful because I couldn't move anything heavy and you dad is too proud to call anyone to help so he moved a lot of the heavy stuff he could by himself and then I made a call for help. He's such a stubborn man.

My doctor's appointments went really well and I was so excited to hear your heartbeat for the first time. That was music to my ears! It came time for my 20 week checkup and that was the appointment that we would find out if you were a boy or a girl. We were so excited! We had just passed the point in the pregnancy where we felt safe. It was past the point where we had lost Gunnar. We thought we were home free. It was a Thursday and it was about 10 am. We were finally called in by the ultrasound tech and got situated in the little room. That's when things changed. The tech tried his hardest not to let us know that something was wrong. He continued joking and trying to keep things light. Then he got really quiet and I started paying more attention to what was going on on the screen. That's when I realized what was going on. Then the words I will never forget came out of his mouth. "Um, guys...I think we have a problem. Let me go get your doctor. I'll be right back." That "right back" seemed like hours when it was only about 5 minutes. I broke down and started freaking out. Your dad tried to keep me calm and told me that it may not be what I thought it was. Dr. Olsen came in and the first things out of his mouth were, "I'm so sorry you guys." Your dad asked him to check it again and put me on a heart monitor. They told him that the ultrasound was the best way to see what was going on. They told us that there was no heartbeat. I had been at odds with a family member and hadn't spoken to them in a few months. At that point, I was told that I needed to contact this person and make things right with them. They told us to take our time composing ourselves and then asked us to wait out in the waiting room until they called us back to figure out what we wanted to do next. I knew there was no way that I could go back out into the waiting room with all those pregnant women. Your dad went out and asked if we could be put into a room that wasn't being used. As they walked us back to another room, I remember all the looks of pity on all the faces of the nurses and office workers. I knew there was no way that I could make it through this struggle without a priesthood blessing. I felt prompted to ask Dr. Olsen if he was LDS and if he held the priesthood. If he was, I was going to ask him for a blessing. I didn't know Dr. Olsen very well so it was a little awkward but I did it anyway. When I asked him, he jumped at the chance without hesitation. He also gave your dad a blessing. The things Dr. Olsen said in those blessings...I know they came directly from our Heavenly Father. He didn't know anything about what he said. I know he was prompted to say them.

October 15th--Pregnancy and Infant Loss Rememberance Day

2010-10-14T10:55:00.003-06:00

Please do this in rememberance of your babies or a friend's baby/babies.

Here is a link for more information: http://www.october15th.com/

Happy late birthday Gunnar!!

2010-10-08T13:52:00.003-06:00

I haven't updated my blog lately but I will work on it! I'm actually working on it but just a little slow in the process. I have a ton to post from all the way back in March but things have been busy. We actually decided to home school Rohbi this year so that has become my full time job! Anyway, I've been thinking about my boys and really missing them. We went over to Boise to visit my in-laws a couple of weeks ago and we drove home on Gunnar's birthday (which was a Saturday) His birthday was September 25th and he turned 2!! We ended up going down to the boys' grave and bringing Gunnar a gift and visiting for a while. That place is so peaceful!! This time of year really sucks for me and I have been struggling but it has slowly become easier to deal with. I've been really weepy lately. Losing two babies 13 months apart really threw me for a loop and it has taken a lot to keep myself sane. Ruger's birthday is coming up on Halloween and it is something I've been dreading and looking forward to at the same time. I want to celebrate it and honor him but at the same time, it brings back all the bad memories and heartache of finding out we lost him and the memories of burying him.

Anyway, I just wanted to share that with you and wish my sweet baby boy a happy birthday!!

Do you know of anyone who needs an oven?

2010-05-15T12:36:00.003-06:00

We just purchased a house less than a year ago and decided to get a new oven. We are getting rid of our old oven and aren't asking anything for it, just that you be willing to come pick it up. The previous owners were pretty hard on it so there are some stains on there that we haven't been able to get off. We have really scrubbed and they haven't come off. It works fine and we have never had any issues with it. Please contact me if you (or someone you might know) are interested or have any questions. My cell phone number is (208) 221-3802 or email idamberl@hotmail.com

The cooked on stuff we haven't been able to get off.

Our trip to Arizona (very picture heavy!!)

2010-05-15T10:28:00.026-06:00

Okay so I'm a few months (almost a year) behind (again) so I'm playing catch up (again)!

Every year Eric's parents winter in Arizona so this year we decided to go down there and visit them. We brought our 4-wheelers and packed up and headed down there. It was so much fun and good to spend time with Leland and Sharon. We got some R&R in, 4-wheeled, ate, hunted for geodes and other rocks, and came home about 20 heavier than when we left! :)

Since Rohbi would be missing school, we got her school work and took it with us.

We decided to take a detour and go see the Hoover Dam since Rohbi and I hadn't seen it before. There was a huge line of cars waiting to go so we got stuck in a huge, long line.

I just thought this was interesting. It was just a bus that took people down to the dam and back instead of them having to take their cars.

We're getting closer! It was such a long drive then we get stuck at a railroad crossing and it took forever for the stupid train to cross!

Rohbi got a hold of the camera...

We finally got there and we were all tired. Eric is trying to rest but he wanted SO BADLY for me to take his picture :)...
then he yells at me for it :( (Okay that's not really how it went lol)

Rohbi already going rock collecting...she had to show Poppy what she found. Blooming cactus...this is just the beginning! They are so pretty!

On our way to Lake Havasu-houses right on the river

The water goes between the houses like streets! I thought it was pretty cool!

City of London (in Lake Havasu City)

Eric is telling Rohbi how to make a wish in a fountain

"Now once you make a wish, you cannot tell anyone what you wished for or it won't come true."

London Bridge Candle Factory. They make their own candles right there! It was so neat to see the process. We bought one for my mom and I wish I would have taken a picture of it so you could see what the finished product looks like! Really neat!!!

You can't tell but she is chasing after the pigeons :)

The London Bridge in the background

Correct me if I'm wrong but I guess they moved this bridge from England a piece at a time. The bricks were numbered.

Haha
We went on a boat ride over to the other side of Lake Havasu. There was a casino there and they dropped us off. Since we had Rohbi with us we couldn't go into the casino and walk around so we went into the restaurant and had some drinks and an appetizer and waited for the boat to come back.
Eric's wonderful parents

Geode hunting
An old mine

Moe's Cabin--People come up here and they bring something with them to leave in the cabin. There were some very interesting things...you will see below...
Moe's grave

"Moe...I am no Moe...May I rest in peace"

Yes that is underwear and bra. Just a few of the many things left there.

I don't even know what to say here. It is an arrow through a cactus but I don't quite know why...I just thought it was intersting!

Taking a break from a long ride...

Poor scared lizard

Eric trying to catch the poor scared lizard.

Going exploring

Always up for a chance to pose I guess this is where he wanted his final resting place to be. I thought this was kinda cool...

The way home. We loved all the red rock

I will catch up eventually

2010-05-06T09:11:00.002-06:00

Just so you know, I am very behind on my blogging! I will get it caught up eventually :)

Thought I'd share

2010-03-10T17:07:00.003-07:00

I follow a few blogs that are written by women who have lost babies. Some of them have come up with creative ways to write baby names and have offered to do it for other people to remember their babies. One writes the names in the sand, I had a lady write the boys' names on a pair of angel wings and she took a picture of them and put them on her blog and then mailed the angel wings to me. Another writes the names on river rocks and here is her blog where she wrote the boys' names on the rocks. I was pretty excited and thought I'd share!

Meet the new addition to our family...

2010-03-06T08:39:00.005-07:00

A couple of weeks ago my parents adopted a new dog from a shelter in Wyoming. When we met her, we fell in love with her. We found out that she had been taken to the shelter with her sister "Princess" so we decided to call the shelter to see if they still had her. Let me back up a little way...my husband has wanted a dog but has been stubborn about it because "we have two cats". Since we have two cats, his excuse was that he felt that we didn't have room for a dog. So fast forward, we called the shelter and they still had Princess. The lady that ran the shelter said that she was coming through to go to Lava so we decided to meet her in Soda to look at the dog. She was so sweet! We decided to give her a try for a week and if we didn't like her, the lady said that we would be able to give her back. The first day we had her, I fell in love with her! She is the sweetest dog! I was a little concerned how she would do with children since I babysit in my home and we have Rohbi and her friends come over a lot. She LOVES kids! We haven't even had her for a week but we know we couldn't give her back now! Let me give you a clue as to how spoiled she is. We sleep with our door shut to keep the cats out. They used to be allowed to sleep in the bed but Eric decided that they took up too much room on the bed and they tend to fight over their places on the bed and wake us up. We decided that the dog was going to sleep in the room across the hall from us. When we put her in the kennel, Eric asked if we should put her in our room. So she ended up in the kennel in our room. Well some time after I fell asleep, Eric let her out. She slept on my side of the bed and farted all night! The next night she climbed up on the bed and that's where she stayed all night and every night since! She is a Stafford shire Bull Terrier. We decided that we didn't like the name Princess though so we re-named her Izzy. Anyway, we love her and thought we would share...

Valentines Day

2010-02-25T13:11:00.004-07:00

Okay so I know this is a little late but better late than never right? :) Sunday morning I was trying to sleep in because I didn't get much sleep the night before. I got a knock at the door. It was Rohbi and I grumpily asked what she wanted. This sweet little voice comes back that she had made me breakfast in bed and wanted to give it to me. I felt really bad for getting after her after that so I opened the door and there she stood with this cookie sheet...

with this note on it...
There were soggy Rice Crispies that had sat there too long obviously because she was waiting for me to wake up, a roll, cookie, candy and a glass of water. You could tell she had put a lot of thought into it. What a sweetheart!

I came out and these were sitting on the table waiting for me...

I have the best family!

It's Time To Give Back

2010-02-05T15:00:00.005-07:00

When we lost Gunnar, it was such a shock, but at the same time, it wasn't because we were warned a couple of days before hand that we could lose him. About 4 months later, I felt ready and wanted to give back to Share Parents because they had given us so much. I asked what it would take to be able to help them and she said that to be able to take care of the babies, I would need a little more distance from my loss before I could do that. The last thing a parent who just lost their baby needs is a stranger falling apart in front of them. So that option was out even though I felt like I could. Right around that time, I learned how to knit and decided that I would make the little gowns, hats, booties, and blankets. I was still a beginner knitter so I knew it would be a while before I would be able to do that. I continued to knit and develop those skills. When we lost Ruger, it was even more of a shock. It was something totally unexpected. I didn't think I would be able to get through a second loss. Thanks to an amazing doctor who was willing to step outside of his job and give two strangers a priesthood blessing (along with prayers and support of our loved ones), I believe we made it through as good, if not better than can be expected. My heart still hurts and I still have some down days and that is something that is ongoing. I'm the type who will play the "poor me" card for quite a while if I can get away with it. I realized a long time ago that it doesn't help my depression one bit to do that and I have a family to take care of. Soooo.....I decided to step outside of myself and take a step toward my healing. After searching on the Internet, I found several sites that had patterns of gowns, booties, hats, etc. for premature babies of all sizes and also for full term stillborns. They are sites where you can get the patterns and then donate what you make to hospitals. I was so excited! I decided to push myself and try these patterns and realized how easy it was to make these things! Anyway, enough of my rambling. I've made a few of each of these things. I even found patterns small enough that they would have fit both Gunnar and Ruger! I made some bigger burial gowns but am working on the smaller ones. These are just a start of what I will be making:

The first burial gown I made

This is an angel pouch. They come in several different sizes for babies of all sizes.

These hats are quite a bit smaller than they look. They would probably fit a 3-5 pounder.
This one is my favorite! It is a beautiful pattern!

Share Parents gave us something that we can never get back. They took pictures of our beautiful little boys. Without those, I honestly don't know if I would be able to remember what they looked like. They also gave us every article of clothing that the boys wore, little tape measures that were marked for how long the boys were, little teddy bears, tiny little baby rings, etc. and all this stuff was put in a memory box. These women are on call any time day or night so when we lost Ruger one of the ladies were called in around 1 am. They've all been in a similar situation and are giving back. It just helped so much in our healing to have a little something to remind us of our babies.

If anyone is interested in helping out, I found patterns that you can knit, crochet, and sew so let me know. You can contact me at idamberl@hotmail.com and I will forward the website addresses to you. I will also give you the info where you can send the stuff. It would be to Share Parents of Logan but if you would rather send them to a different hospital, I can help you figure out where to send them. I also know that they could use all the donations (money) they could get so if you are interested and would like to do that in addition to or instead of making things, let me know and I can get you that info. They whole point of this post was just to update you on what I've been up to and to include you in my healing process and not to recruit so please don't feel obligated to help out. It's just if you are interested.

Two Left Feet

2010-02-05T14:02:00.008-07:00

This year we decided to get Rohbi signed up for dance lessons and she also had the opportunity to sign up for a mini cheer camp. This is the first year she has participated in either one. She has loved doing it even though she has no rhythm and two left feet :) She tries and that's all that matters. She performed in the cheer camp at half time at a girls home basket ball game. The cheer camp was the day before and I had been sick for a couple of days. Half way through the cheer camp she called and said she was sick so she didn't learn the dance. She performed the dance anyway and really you would be able to tell the difference because she was right on step with the other girls! I didn't get any video because we are 10 years behind on technology and are probably one of the only people without a video camera.

A couple of weeks later she performed at the dance extravaganza. Her Grandma and Grandpa Gould came and she was so excited! She said that she was nervous but she did really well! I decided to do something fun with her hair and it turned out really cute so I had to show it off :) It took me an hour but it was fun!

Christmas

2009-12-29T22:00:00.008-07:00

We had a great Christmas this year. Eric's family sent a ton of gifts and of course about 95% of them were Rohbi's. She was so excited and loved everything she got. Almost every day she would ask me if she could "organize" the presents. I know that it was to see which ones were for her so she could have quick access to them. Christmas morning my parents came over and the plan was to start opening gifts at 7:30 am and then have a nice breakfast afterward. I got up at 7 so I could be there when Rohbi got up so she couldn't get into the presents without us being there. I waited and waited and waited. No one woke up. 7:30 came and went...7:45...finally at 7:50 my parents showed up and I told them that Rohbi and Eric were a bunch of poops because I was the only one up!

I went and woke Rohbi and Eric up...

and then we waited for Eric to drag his lazy butt out of bed...
Finally he came out and Rohbi (anxiously waiting) could finally start opening presents.

We headed down to Preston for Christmas lunch with my family and then exchanging gifts. This year we decided to do a homemade gift exchange. It was kind of stressful and at times I didn't know if I would finish the gifts in time but it was a lot of fun and the finished product didn't turn out too bad either :) I also made something for the two kids that I watch. I didn't take a picture of the hat I made for Cooper but I made Bailee a cute little purse and thought it turned out really cute so I just had to brag real quick :)

Our visit to the boys' grave

2009-12-29T21:22:00.005-07:00

This year we decided to put up a tree on the boys' grave. Hopefully this well become a yearly thing. It was a lot of fun and the boys needed a tree too :)

Eric and Rohbi didn't like that there were graves that didn't have anything on them. Rohbi thought it was because their families didn't love them. It really bothered her. So she and Eric went around and put some of the ornaments we brought on the headstones that didn't have anything on them.

The boys' cute little neighbor. Eric told the boys not to fight over her :)
Some of the graves they decorated.

The tree after it was done. Please don't judge it by the way it looks. It was decorated with love :)

Rohbi wanted to build a little snowman for the boys. After I accidentally stepped on the first two she made, she decided to just hurry and build one for both of them.

We had a really fun day decorating the grave. It sounds weird but that is all we have left of them and want it to stay kept up and looking nice. We also wanted to put something fun on there kind like we are in a way including them in our Christmas celebration. It was really hard for me to leave them when it was time to go.

Finding ways to cope

2009-12-12T22:35:00.002-07:00

This post is more for my sake than anything else so if you don't want to read it, I'm totally fine with that.

This time of year is so hard for me. Potato harvest is hard for me because we lost Gunnar during potato harvest and then we lost Ruger 13 months later. It's hard to face the holidays knowing I don't have my two boys to celebrate them with. I'm not discounting the fact that we're so blessed to have Rohbi because I don't know what I would do without her. I found after losing Gunnar that it was easier to get through Christmas by acknowledging him. I went out and bought him and Rohbi both an ornament. I also bought another stocking to put up for him. Even though he wasn't there, it helped a lot to remember him and include him. Since we now have a grave to go to, we have decided to put a tree up at the grave and decorate it. I also bought ornaments for all three kids and another stocking for Ruger. Rohbi asked if she could hang up Gunnar and Ruger's ornaments after she hung up hers. She was so excited to hang them up for her little brothers. She's also excited to be able to go to the cemetery and decorate the grave.

For me, being able to talk about my boys and about my emotions helps me so much. I have a couple of family members and friends who have gone through losses of their own and just being able to talk to them and know that my emotions are normal has helped. Even thought it probably hurt for them to talk about their losses, they have been so patient with me and have let me vent and let my emotions out.

I am so blessed to have such a great family support and great friends who have been there for me. I can't express enough how much that has meant to me. I have a strong husband and daughter who have been my rock. They are hurting as much as I am but have stayed strong.

I know there is a reason for everything. I know that the Lord doesn't give us more than we can handle. I know that some day I will find out why I had to go through this. It's just trying to find the patience until then :)

Time to catch up again

2009-12-12T22:14:00.004-07:00

I was so caught up in the drama we've had recently that I completely forgot to post pictures of Rohbi on Halloween.

We had Ruger so early on Halloween morning that they discharged us that afternoon. Even though we were going through a rough time, we knew we couldn't disappoint Rohbi more than we had. We missed going to her Halloween carnival because we were admitted to Labor and Delivery that day and didn't have the baby until 2 days later. I felt so guilty for missing it and wished we could have been there. Luckily I have a wonderful family and one of my sisters took time out of her busy schedule and drove her kids up here and took Rohbi to the carnival. That night we headed up to Soda to the Trunk or Treat there. We went over to my parents' house after that so that they could see Rohbi in her costume and visited for a few minutes and then headed home. We had been in the hospital almost 40 hours before I ended up having Ruger and I hadn't slept more than maybe an hour total up to that point because of nurses coming in, machines going off because my blood pressure was too low, etc. Once I got out of surgery, I was able to get a few hours of sleep before they woke me up for breakfast or something (I really can't remember). By the time we got done with the Trunk or Treat and visiting with my parents, I was exhausted so we headed home and called it a night.

I'm so behind in posting. I feel bad. For Thanksgiving, Eric and I decided at the last minute to head to Boise to spend Thanksgiving with his family. It's the first time in about 15 years that the whole family has been together for the holiday so it was time. It was the first time I wasn't with my side of the family for a holiday but I'm so glad we went up there. We had a great time! I'm such an idiot and didn't take any pictures! We hadn't had the chance to meet Brandon and Jessie's little boy who is almost one and we were so excited to see him. He's such a cutie and we wished we could have spent more time with him and Brandon and Jessie. We don't get to see them enough! We had a wonderful dinner. The kids had a hay day playing from morning until night. Eric's sister, Shelly, asked me if I wanted to go shopping with her on Black Friday and even though I swore I would never go again, I knew I had shopping to get done. I'm so glad I went with her. Even though it was so crazy, I had so much fun being able to spend time with her! After we went shopping, Eric decided to take Shelly and I on a date to go see the new Twilight movie "New Moon". It was so good! It was such a fun weekend and it was great to see my in-laws again. We don't get enough time to spend with them.

Poems I read at the memorial

2009-11-04T10:00:00.002-07:00

I'll Be There
Daddy, please don't look so sad,
Mama please don't cry
Cause I'm in the arms of Jesus
and He sings me lullabies.
Please try not to question God,
Don't think He is unkind.
Don't think he sent me to you,
and then He changed His mind.
You see, I am a special child,
and I'm needed up above.
I'm the special gift you gave Him,
the product of your love.
I'll always be there with you
and watch the sky at night,
Find the brightest star that's gleaming,
that's my halo's brilliant light.
You'll see me in the morning frost,
that mists your window pane.
That's me in the summer showers,
I'll be dancing in the rain.
When you feel a little breeze,
from a gentle wind that blows
That's me, I'll be there,
planting a kiss on your nose.
When you see a child playing,
and your heart feels a little tug,
That's me, I'll be there giving your heart a hug.
So Daddy, please don't look so sad,
Mama don't you cry.
I'm in the arms of Jesus and He sings me lullabies

I thought of you and closed my eyes,
And prayed to God today.
I asked what makes a Mother,
And I know I heard him say:
A mother has a baby,
This we know is true.
But, God, can you be a mother,
When your baby's not with you?
Yes, you can he replied,
With confidence in his voice.
I give many women babies,
When they leave is not their choice.
Some I send for a lifetime,
And others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb,
But there’s no need to stay.
I just don't understand this God,
I want my baby here.
He took a breath and cleared his throat,
And then I saw a tear.
I wish that I could show you,
What your child is doing today,
If you could see your child smile,
With other children who say:
We go to earth and learn our lessons,
Of love and life and fear.
My mommy loved me oh so much,
I got to come straight here.
I feel so lucky to have a mom,
Who had so much love for me.
I learned my lessons very quickly,
My mommy set me free.
I miss my mommy oh so much,
But I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep,
On her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,
And whisper in her ear.
"Mommy don't be sad today, I'm your baby and I'm here."
So you see my dear sweet one,
Your children are Ok.
Your babies are here in My home,
They'll be at heavens gate for you.
So now you see what makes a mother.
It's the feeling in your heart.
It's the love you had so much of,
Right from the very start.
Though some on earth may not realize you are a mother,
until their time is done.
They'll be up here with Me one day,
And you'll know that you're the best one!

The Memorial

2009-11-04T08:55:00.008-07:00

So tiny...

This smile can make any sad person happy. Cloe and Cambree were there also. They've all helped heal my heart through both losses.

Two wonderful men...

The memorial was short but sweet. I'm so glad that we have a place to go now to visit both of our boys. We have had so much support and so many people have showed their concern. We both have such wonderful families and friends and we are so lucky to have them. The drive to Logan was one of the longest drives I have ever had to make in my life. I don't think anyone can be ready to plan a funeral for anyone. Thanks to Eric for making all the arrangements, everything got done. I don't know what I would do without him. He has been such a strength and support for me. Rohbi is a strong little girl and has also been a strength for me.

A little update...

2009-11-01T17:19:00.002-07:00

I figured I'd better update you guys a little bit on what is going on. We went in on Thursday for our ultrasound. We went in for the ultrasound and were told that there was a problem and he went to get our doctor. We found out that there was no heartbeat. We found out later that it was because the cord was wrapped around his neck and the cord by his belly button was twisted so bad that he was unable to get any nourishment. We found out after we delivered that we had another boy and we named him Ruger. We delivered him at 12:50 on October 31st. We will be having a memorial tomorrow and will do a double dedication for both him and Gunnar since we didn't have a normal burial for Gunnar. Anyway, we are struggling right now but we're getting through. We're just so blessed to have two very special spirits that we can call our children. We love them so much and know that we will be able to raise them when the time is right.

Do you think it will be a boy or a gilr?

2009-10-19T17:46:00.002-06:00

We will be having our 20 week ultrasound on October 29th and we will be finding out if we're having a boy or a girl. I kind of have an idea of what it might be and I know what Eric and I want but I'm just curious to see what you guys think...Below is the link to a quiz I created because I couldn't get a poll put on my blog without part of it being cut off. I'll update you on the results of the quiz and what the ultrasound actually shows on the 29th.

http://www.quibblo.com/quiz/b0nueSA/Do-you-think-we-are-having-a-girl-or-a-boy

SURPRISE!!!!!

2009-10-09T10:40:00.005-06:00

Make a pregnancy ticker

Our trip to Gunnar's grave

2009-10-05T19:03:00.004-06:00

We went to visit Gunnar's grave on the 26th. Eric wanted to leave a little cop car on the grave and I knitted a pair of booties to put there. It was hard to visit but at the same time it was really healing. He is buried in Baby Land which is in the Logan Cemetery. A nurse bought a bunch of plots there and donated them to Share Parents so that parents who lose babies have a place to bury them.

This is the angel statue they put there

The back side of the statue

The car and booties we left for him.

Boys and their toys...

2009-10-05T18:52:00.003-06:00

So Eric and I went on a date a couple of Saturdays ago. We went to visit Gunnar's grave. On the way through Preston, he makes a comment about stopping by one of the car dealerships to look at one of their vehicles. I said okay and didn't think much of it. Well as we came back through Preston, he stopped to take a look at it. He was so excited and went on and on about how awesome this thing is. Well, from the looks of it, it isn't that great, but okay I'll take your word for it. He decided to head down there the next time he worked just to ask about it. It just so happened he was in his cop outfit so I'm sure that helped a little bit ;) Anyway, the price was right and last week we walked away owners of a 1984 or 85 Cutvee (sp). It's an old military vehicle. I now present to you the Green Monster!

Drum roll please.......

Isn't she purty? :)

To my baby boy

2009-09-24T11:33:00.003-06:00

Dear Gunnar,
I can’t believe it’s already been a year since you blessed our lives and then left just as quickly. It doesn’t seem like that long ago that we found out that we were pregnant with you. When we saw that faint line, we were so excited! As the weeks moved on, I enjoyed every minute of the pregnancy and even though I was quite sick, I was just happy to be pregnant. When I hit 12 weeks, things changed. I started cramping pretty badly. When I hit my 17 week mark, I started bleeding. In between those two times, I had called the doctor, went into his office, and had two ultrasounds and every time, they told me that it was normal to experience a little cramping and that the bleeding was probably just implantation bleeding. We did, however, find out that you were a boy when we went in for the ultrasound at 17 weeks. We were both excited but I think your dad was about to fly through the roof! He was so excited to have his little boy! He had your name picked out for years! Things just progressively got worse from there. When I was about 20 weeks, I finally called and told the doctor’s office that they could call me a paranoid expectant mother all they wanted but I knew that something was wrong! The bleeding got worse and so did the cramping. They called and got me an appointment to have a thorough ultrasound done at the hospital. That was Tuesday, September 23rd. Dad was in Boise for some training so he wasn’t there but my mom decided to come with me. I guess it was mothers’ intuition and she knew that I might need her. She took off the rest of the day of work and we drove down to Logan to the hospital. They had a hard time seeing things when they did the ultrasound but I didn’t know it was a bad sign. I was excited to see you moving around. After what seemed to be forever, they finished up the ultrasound and sent me over to the doctors’ office. My doctor was out of town so I had to communicate with by phone. By the time I got to the office, the ultrasound tech had already called the doctor and informed him of what was going on. That was when my life turned upside down. When I got on the phone with the doctor, he told me that there was hardly any amniotic fluid around you and that there was quite a large tear in the placenta. He told me that at this point there was nothing we could do and that more than likely we would lose you. He sent me back over to the hospital for some blood work and told me to come back in two days, which was a Thursday. Dad and I were both crushed. He wouldn’t be home from training until really late Wednesday night/Thursday morning. By the time Dad got home, I was in so much pain and told him that I thought I was in labor. Finally by 1:30 am the pain had subsided quite a bit and I was able to get some sleep......(cont below.....)

To my baby boy, cont...

2009-09-24T11:26:00.005-06:00

I was up by 4:30 am because I couldn’t sleep and was so scared of what we would find out at the doctors’ office. I had called my dad to see if he could come over before we left for Logan to see if he would give me a healing blessing. I was grasping at straws at this point and was hoping that in the blessing, he would tell me that everything would be okay. Instead, we were told that I would be okay and that was pretty much all we knew. I knew he couldn’t just tell us what we wanted to hear and at that point I knew what was going to happen but I was in denial. We got to the doctor’s office and the nurse put the Doppler on to hear your heartbeat. When I heard it, I broke down. The nurse stood there and cried with me. The doctor came in and checked me. He said that I was already dilated to a 2 and he could feel your foot. I guess my body was just going through the natural process of starting labor. We asked him what would happen because we knew you were still alive. There was nothing we could do. He sent us over to be admitted into the hospital and prepare for the worst day of our lives. After we got all the paperwork done and I was hooked up to all the machines, the nurses came in with some information on a group called Share Parents. They told us that if we wanted them to, they would come in and take pictures and put together a little memory box for us. We told them that we wanted them to do that. We were admitted just after 11 am and waited for hours. They didn’t want to push things and just wanted my body to take care of things. By 6:31 pm on September 25, 2008, you were born. You weighed 9.2 ounces and measured 9 ½ inches. They told us that you had passed away before you were born. My mom had come down to be with us and she was the first one to hold you. I hadn’t decided whether I wanted to hold you or not. The idea of death was so scary to me and I didn’t know if I wanted to remember you that way. Your dad didn’t want to and it wasn’t that he didn’t love you but he didn’t want to remember you that way either. He was hurting so bad. He left to get some dinner and just to get some air and try to clear his mind. During that time, the wonderful ladies from Share Parents came in and let me just see the pictures they had taken of you. They also had you there wrapped up just incase I decided to hold you. You were perfect. The ladies from Share said that it was quite obvious that you were a boy :) After seeing the pictures, I knew I had to hold you and spend some time with you. You looked so much like your daddy. I remember noticing the shape of your lips. When your cousin, Sammy, was born, he had your same lips :) The nurse was kind enough to sit in there with me while I held you. I just needed someone there with me. I didn’t want to be alone. When Dad got back from town, I kissed your cheek and wrapped you back up and let them take you. I was able to see you whenever I wanted so I knew I would get to see you again. I told your dad what you looked like and that you looked a lot like him. I think he knew that he needed closure too and needed to see you. Your dad’s a strong man and hardly ever shows emotion, but when he held you and saw you for the first time, he broke down. It was hard on both of us but he took things really hard. They gave me a sleeping pill so I could get some rest the night before we left. I guess some time during the night I was up wondering the halls. They had to take me back to my room. After a somewhat restless night in an uncomfortable hospital bed, they sent us home. I remember thinking that it was weird and very unfair to be going home without you in my arms. When we got home, we had to break the news to Rohbi. Having lost her dad a year prior, she took things really hard and asked why everyone around her died. It broke my heart. As the days dragged on, my arms ached to hold you. It’s not fair to carry a baby only to come home and have to deal with empty arms. Sweet baby boy, just know that there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about you. The pain hasn’t gone away but it’s gotten a little easier to deal with. We love you so much and miss you more than you can ever imagine.

Love,

Mom

I chose not to put any actual pictures of Gunnar up just because I don't want someone I don't know looking at him. It's too personal and sacred to me. If you would like to see more pictures of him, feel free to let me know and I would be happy to email them to you.

Time to play catch up!!

2009-09-17T17:18:00.005-06:00

Okay so I haven't been on the stick and updated my blog for a couple of months so I decided I'd better catch up! The last couple of months have been extremely crazy and busy! With school starting in August, I've had to adjust to the early mornings (I'm so not a morning person). On top of that, I started watching two kids in the mornings to help their mom out so she could go back to school to finish up her degree. They've been a lot of fun! But to be quite honest, this month has been a little rough for me. We are coming up on the one year anniversary of when we lost Gunnar so I've struggled a little bit. Anyway, here is what we have been up to the last couple of months! CAUTION: THIS POST IS VERY PICTURE HEAVY!!!

In July, Eric's family had a huge family reunion at Riverdale that lasted almost a week. One of Eric's cousins owns Riverdale so they were nice enough to host it and cater it. Since they were having the reunion there, I decided to get Rohbi into swimming lessons that week. The reunion was a ton of fun and I enjoyed meeting some more of Eric's extended family and spending time with them! Rohbi enjoyed staying in Eric's parents camper and playing with her cousins. Rohbi enjoyed her swimming lessons and come to find out, Eric's cousin was Rohbi's swimming teacher. I was very impressed with her. Rohbi has been very scared of the water and putting her face in it and by the end of lessons, her teacher had her jumping into the water over her head and she was loving it!

Eric happens to share a birthday with his sister. They are exactly a year apart. This year, their birthdays happened to fall on the last day of the reunion. His parents decided to treat them to a day at Lagoon so after all the goodbyes, we headed down to Farmington. Well...since Eric is such a party pooper, he wasn't there to enjoy the fun. We had a ton of fun and appreciate his parents inviting us to come along!

Rohbi learned a few lessons along the way. I needed to head to the post office one day for some reason so as we were headed out the door, Rohbi decided to sneak up on our cat who happens to have very sharp claws and is very jumpy and was asleep. Let's just say that it wasn't a very pretty scene! I don't know if I've ever seen that much blood all at once except for maybe on TV. I know that facial and head wounds bleed a lot more than normal wounds but it was very bloody!!! She freaked out and I about puked! Anyway, she ended up with about a 1/2 inch gash on her temple. She was so scared to go into the doctor's office because she didn't want to get stitches. Once we got in there, the doctor took a look at the scratch and said that they would just glue it. Thank goodness for modern technology!

We've had a very busy couple of months and a lot has changed with us! We started looking for a house to buy and finally found one and put in an offer. It took a little longer than we had hoped but by the middle of August we finally finalized things and became "official homeowners"! We're excited and have enjoyed the new house even though we've had a few bumps. We've got a lot of work ahead of us on this house and it needs quite a few updates. We had to do quite a bit of work just to be able to move in. Once we moved in, we made a few changes and Eric has been working himself ragged trying to keep on top of plumbing leaks and leaks from the outside of the house in. Now that those things have slowed down, we've been able to enjoy the house a little bit more! By the way, I LOVE MY KITCHEN!!!! (just had to throw that in!) Eric put in a water softener and Rohbi has had a ball playing in the box!

In the second picture, she is trying to look scary but she just looks scared! :)

On August 19th, Rohbi started her first day of 1st grade! I can't believe she's that old! She's enjoying it. It's been an adjustment for her going all day but she has progressed so much and has learned a ton! It's fun to watch all she is learning as she brings home all her work that she has done at school. She has excelled in spelling and doing very well with her reading but she is struggling a little with math and paying attention to her work. It's all a learning curve and hopefully eventually it will come for her!

Doesn't she look so big?

Anyway, sorry it has been so long but hope you enjoyed seeing what we've been up to!

4th of July weekend

2009-07-11T09:49:00.003-06:00

This year for the 4th, Rohbi's grandparents, Jean and Bruce, decided to take Rohbi to Lander, Wyoming. I hadn't ever been there so I begged to go and they were nice enough to let me tag along. We had a great time! We watched their parade, tried to go to their rodeo but got rained out, visited with friends and family, shopped, and toured. While we were there, we stayed with our great friends, Butch and Marsha, who we actually consider family. They are great people and we love them to death! I thought it would be interesting to see what Rohbi thought because she told Eric and I that she didn't believe that Indians really existed. I told her that when we went to Lander, she would see a lot of them. I think by the end of the trip, she was pretty convinced :) They do the 4th a little different there. The people were letting fire crackers off from the morning until midnight. They make it a huge celebration! "Uncle Dave" bought Rohbi a couple of boxes of fire crackers and she had a ball letting them off. I imagine the cops stay pretty busy there. We actually witnessed how busy they stay right in front of Butch and Marsha's house. It was pretty scary but it sounds like things will be okay.

Thanks so much Butch and Marsha for letting us stay with us and showing us such a fun time! We love you guys!

Rohbi at the parade with her new Indian friend

This was so cool!

Rohbi and me at Sinks Canyon

Rainbow trout at Sinks Canyon. You can't tell by the picture but these fish were HUGE! I think the sign said that they weighed between 10 and 15 lbs. Rohbi had fun feeding them.

Happy Father's Day!

2009-06-21T13:45:00.004-06:00

I just wanted to put a quick post up and wish all the dads a Happy Father's day! Now I get to brag about my hubby ;)

Eric is an amazing husband! He has been my rock and my best friend. He has been a great father to Rohbi and gave me a beautiful son. He has such a strong testimony and has really been a strength to me. I'm grateful to have someone who is so strong in his beliefs, in my life. We have had a few ups and downs but it has only made our marriage that much stronger. I love him so much and am truly lucky to have someone like him in my life! Happy Father's day babe!

Fishin', T-ball, and Golf...

2009-06-17T14:49:00.005-06:00

I've been stressing about how I could keep Rohbi busy this summer. She gets bored really quickly and now that school is out, she doesn't have all her school mates to play with every day. I signed her up for t-ball and she has enjoyed it a lot! She had her first game last night and she did really well! Last Saturday was free fishing day at the Grace fish hatchery so we went there and had some fun. Her Grandma Jean also talked to me about signing her up for golf lessons so we have been going down every Wednesday. I have also signed her up for swim lessons. Hopefully she will be kept busy enough that she won't complain too much about being bored. That kid hates being away from the social part of school. It's driving her crazy!!!

She lost interest really quickly while we were there. She wanted to play with the other kids there. She also wasn't too thrilled about touching the fish. Every time the fish would move, she would squeal and move away. She and Eric ended up catching 6 fish but they let all of them go. I think if we would have caught a big one, we would have kept it...

These were taken on my on my phone so they aren't' very clear.

She was excited about going until she got there and realized that she really didn't know how to golf and she got really frustrated with it real quick. They also had the first lesson inside the clubhouse because it was cold and rainy and Rohbi didn't think that was right. You're supposed to be golfing outside and she let us know that loud and clear. After the first lesson, she was ready to quit but we have talked her into staying in till the end.

Oregon Coast/Girls Weekend 2009 (cont...)

2009-06-09T15:06:00.008-06:00

Continued....

The Inn At Spanish Head...the hotel we stayed in that opened up right to the beach. We were on the 1st floor

I think these pictures say it all. Nice relaxing moments on the beach.

Settling in for the night

Rohbi wanted me to get a picture of a crab while I was there and the only live crab we found was this little tiny one :)

I didn't realize that starfish were actually a different color than just the white ones you see.

These little green things were kinda weird. They closed up when you touch them.

There was a restaurant called "Lil Sambo's" and my daughter loves the story about Little Black Sambo. My mom, Rohbi and I were all pretty excited about this one :)

There was also a road called Bates Rd and I was going to go get a picture of that too but I was too tired.

On the way to Silver Falls

Silver Falls...so pretty and the smells were amazing! Words don't even do it justice!!!

There was a trail that you could follow and it wound all the way underneath and back up again.

Erosion chimneys

The other side...

Oregon Coast/Girls Weekend 2009!

2009-06-09T14:11:00.009-06:00

I know a few of you have already seen these pictures on Facebook but bear with me because there are others who haven't seen them. I'm not going to give you a big long schpeel on what we did but I will give you the basics of our trip! We had an amazing time and it was so beautiful up there!!! We flew into Portland where we met up with Jayne Ann. Saturday, we headed to Tillamook and spent some time at the cheese factory and then over to Cape Meares to see the lighthouse. After that, we headed to Lincoln City, where we got a hotel room that opened up right onto the beach. Sunday, we did a little shopping then headed back to Salem where we headed up to Silverton and went to see Silver Falls. We had a ton of fun along the way! Lots of laughs, memories, and fun!

This is so weird! This is giant asparagus!!! I guess it is supposed to be decorative because it was in a flower garden.

Jayne Ann

Jennifer

Me

Tillamook Cheese Factory

On the way over to Cape Meares

Giant slug!!!!! So disgusting!

Kinda looks like a scene from Twilight doesn't it? It seemed like that all weekend :)

Cape Meares...on the way up to the "Octopus Tree"

The Octopus Tree (Sitka Spruce)

These next pictures don't give the actual scenery justice! It was so pretty and green up there!

The lighthouse

On the way to Lincoln City

Our Fun 4-wheeling Trip Sunday!

2009-05-19T10:50:00.009-06:00

We have been trying to coordinate a 4-wheeling trip with Seth and the boys for a few weeks now so we decided to plan it for this weekend. Since Seth and the boys really needed a break from all the drama going on in their lives right now, they decided to come down here and tour our part of the state :) It was a lot of fun!

This is the rubber boa we found just as we were starting off. YUCK!!!

The first stop we made was on top of a mountain that separates Soda and Grace

Eric wouldn't let me take a picture of him. He kept turning his head so I had to catch him off guard!

These two never shut up! :) Just kidding but they can carry on a pretty lengthy conversation!

The Grace side of the mountain with all the farm land

The Soda side of the mountain. That's the Alexander Reservoir

This is the best picture I could get. In all the pictures I tried to take of all of them, at least one of them were looking a different way. This is the only picture I could get of two of them looking at me and smiling. Order is Rohbi, Masyn, and Bradyn

We stopped for lunch and found some sea shells so the kids set out to see who could find the most shells. And by kids I mean Eric too :)

Still looking....

Masyn decided he wanted to get down and play with "BroBro" and "Wobie"

What's a 4-wheeling trip without a little showing off?! Eric and Bradyn took off on a trail just to see where it went so Seth, Masyn, Rohbi and I stayed behind and found some straw bails to play on

Rohbi had to feel included too :)

After 4-wheeling all day, Seth still found the energy to wrestle around with all of the kids. I don't know where he found it because I was beat!

I'm worn out just looking at the pictures!

It was definately a fun weekend and I think the boys were able to take their minds off all the crap back home for a little bit! Hopefully they'll be able to make another trip down here but I think next time we will try to head up there!

"I lost my tooth!!!"

2009-04-30T08:46:00.005-06:00

Tuesday, while Rohbi was eating lunch, we hear Rohbi yell that she lost her tooth. The neighbor dog had jumped up to lick her face and ended up knocking her tooth loose. She was so excited when it fell out and we had a hard time getting her to settle back down and finish eating her sandwich so we could get her off to school! At least it wasn't like her first tooth and she was chewing on it thinking it was a peanut! YUCK!! She is so excited about losing her teeth because the tooth fairy comes but I'm not too fond of sticking my finger in her mouth to feel how loose it is. The whole thing really grosses me out! She has lost 3 teeth total. Two she has lost while eating something and one she had pulled by the dentist.

This is the first tooth she lost where she thought she was chewing on a peanut.

This is the one she lost on Tuesday.

I'm a Life Timer!!!

2009-04-28T09:52:00.003-06:00

Well, after 6 weeks of maintenance at Weight Watchers, I finally hit life time! Now, as long as I stay within a couple of pounds of my goal weight, I don't have to pay! I haven't been the best at staying on the plan but this gives me motivation to stay on track.

I'm Leavin' On A Jet Plane.....

2009-04-15T09:46:00.003-06:00

I've recently gotten back in contact with my roommates from when I lived in Pocatello. We lost touch pretty much since we all went our separate ways. Anyway, it's been fun to get to know them again and get caught up on what has happened in each other's lives in the last 10 years (wow we're getting old!) Anyway, all three of our birthdays are in June so Jennifer and I decided to plan a trip to Oregon where Jayne Ann lives to visit and celebrate all of our birthdays! I just bought my tickets and I am so excited to go up there! It will be fun to talk about old times and just visit!

Shake Your Bootie!!!

2009-04-15T09:30:00.006-06:00

I've always known Rohbi had a natural rhythm and she loves to dance. I've never gotten her in to dance lessons either because she didn't want to or she decided she did want to and we missed the sign up date. She was on the computer last night and found a song that she really liked on one of her websites and played it over and over again. When I finally found my camera, this is what I caught:

Coloring Easter Eggs

2009-04-15T09:13:00.004-06:00

Saturday, the boys (Eric and my dad) decided to ditch us girls to go to an auction. So we decided to make a day of it. We went to the Easter Egg Hunt and Mom had some stuff to get done at home so Rohbi and I went home to color Easter eggs and then us girls were going to go out to lunch. Rohbi had a lot of fun. At first, I didn't want her to get her hands dirty and get the dye all over them so I was helping her lift the eggs out of the dye and putting them back in the carton. After a while, I decided it wasn't any fun if you couldn't color yourself while you were at it! She may have gotten a little carried away, but she had fun!

Easter Egg Hunt

2009-04-15T08:59:00.003-06:00

Soda Lyon's Club sponsored an Easter Egg Hunt in the Soda city park so Saturday we showed up expecting to see eggs spread all over. Instead, when we showed up, we saw candy all over. Okay?? Anyway, Rohbi was excited and walked away with a TON of candy. Last year we were supposed to go to an Easter Egg Hunt in Burley with our friends up there. Eric and I accidentally slept in so we were late getting there and by the time we showed up, all the eggs were gone. A little boy walked up to each of the kids and handed them each an egg out of his bag. Come to find out, they showed up late so there were some kids who gave him a few eggs. He didn't have a lot of eggs in his bag but he sacrificed and gave up three of his. So this year, Eric and I wanted to make sure Rohbi shared if there were any kids who didn't get a lot or any. There was a little girl who showed up really late and pretty much all the candy was gone. I told Rohbi that she ought to give the little girl some of her candy. I thought she would walk up and just give her a few pieces but she reached in her bucket and gave the girl a huge handful of candy. There was another boy behind us who had also just gotten there and he was working at a little pile of candy he found and Rohbi just walked up to him also and put some more candy out for him to pick up. I was so proud of her! She has some issues with sharing so I didn't expect her to be that generous with her candy!

Create

2009-04-01T22:03:00.003-06:00

I stole this off of my friend Jayne Ann's blog but I thought it was just really neat. Click here to view this. I love this man's messages! He is great!

My baby is 6 years old!!!

2009-03-30T19:35:00.005-06:00

Time flies so fast! I still remember the day that I had her and will never let her live down the fact that she almost killed me (literally) lol but she has been such a blessing in our lives and has such a strong personality. She is so amazingly strong. She has been through a lot in her short life but has come out on top! Happy birthday baby girl!!!

So we decided to do two different birthdays. We did the friend one from 11-2 and they had fun playing games, eating pizza, and eating cake. I think I would have gone crazy with 8 six year olds running around my house so we decided to do it at a little fast food restaurant here in Grace. They have a little banquet room where we can lock the kids in and let them run to their content. The birthday party didn't really have a theme. I guess we kind of did it more along the lines of princess. I went onto Bettycrocker.com and found an idea for a Barbie cake so this is how the cake turned out. Now remember that I am a professional cake decorator (with a huge hint of sarcasm) so of course it turned out great! Right? :) Actually it turned out pretty crappy and crooked but she didn't know the difference.

Duck, duck, goose

Expelling some energy...geez I wish I could bottle up some of that so I could use it when I don't have the energy to do something!

We ended up with one extra. One of the girls' mom asked if they could bring their son by for just a short time. He was so much fun that we invited him to stay for the whole party! He jumped right in to play the princess games. The crown he is wearing is a king crown, not a tiara. He even knew the answer to some of the trivia questions I threw out there to them. It was cute!

After her friend birthday, we had a family birthday. We enjoyed visiting with family and Rohbi loved the presents she got from her aunts and cousins. She also recieved a card from Aunt Shelly with a nice surprise in it! Thanks guys!

The boa and the sleeping bag came all the way from Arizona from her Grammy and Poppy Bates. They are so good to remember her birthday and she was so excited to see what they sent her this time. My mother-in-law is so good at sewing! She sends Rohbi a pillow case for every holiday. Thank you Sharon!

Grandma LaRee and Grandpa Kirt bought her a porcelain doll. It is a fairy and Rohbi was so excited!

Do you see anything that doesn't belong? Xoe cannot resist the urge to explore anything that is out of the ordinary! She's obsessed with boxes and enjoyed her share of boxes on Rohbi's birthday!

Of course we can't forget Grandma and Grandpa Gould! They couldn't make it for Rohbi's birthday because Bruce's mom had a massive heart attack and passed away, so they made a rush trip to Wyoming to take care of things there. Our thoughts are with them. We love you guys!

Thanks everyone for the gifts and cards! Rohbi loved her gifts and had a great birthday!

I hit my goal!!!

2009-03-24T10:48:00.002-06:00

I've been attending Weight Watchers since October. I finally hit my 10% last week. Yesterday I hit my goal and then a few lbs! Now I have to do my 6 week maintenance before I can have my lifetime! Sorry, boring news but I was pretty excited!

CRAP!!!!

2009-03-23T17:13:00.002-06:00

So I was reading my friend Laura's blog and she was talking about how they woke up to snow on the ground and I was laughing because I just knew we wouldn't be getting anymore snow...guess the joke is on me. We woke up this morning to stinkin' 1 1/2" of snow!!! Crappy! I'm so ready for spring and just when it warms up, it gets cold again. Oh well. Soon it will be warm again and we will finally be able to go outside and enjoy the sunshine!!!

DEAD MICE?!

2009-03-12T23:11:00.003-06:00

There is something dead under our house!!! I walked in the bedroom a few days ago and was hit with this rancid stench! We cleaned out from under our bed and there was nothing there. We finally pinpointed where it was coming from and it was our vent! We live in a house that is two single wide trailers and an add on so all the stuff like duct work and pluming is under the house. So anyway, Eric climbed under the house and braved the nastiness under there. He said that he could smell where it was coming from and it smelled like it was up in the insulation. He pulled that down and found a mouse but it was decayed too much to be what we were smelling. Our room stinks and right now as I type, I can smell the stench wafting into the office here! Ugh...I want to go puke now...

Happy Anniversary!!

2009-03-09T20:37:00.004-06:00

So my sister-in-law emailed me and said that I haven't updated my blog in a while so I needed to kick it in the butt!! I realized that I haven't but we were leaving for the weekend to celebrate our ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY so I would get to it when we came back.

We went to Logan and stayed at the Anniversary Inn in the Jesse James Hideout! For those of you who don't know, that room seems to be the most popular one there so I was so excited when we were able to reserve it! Anyway, we were pretty boring but it was a nice weekend to just sit and be lazy and relax. We got Chinese take-out and came back to the room and gorged ourselves until we were both so sick! Then we just hung out for the rest of the night. The next day we got up and ate the complimentary breakfast they left at our door. It was yummy! Then we went to the movie "Taken". That is such a good movie! It keeps you on the edge of your seat the whole movie! Then we went to Iggy's and ate a burger (so good!). Then Share Parents were looking for volunteers who were willing to help sell concessions at the USU basketball game. It happened to fall on the weekend we were celebrating our anniversary so we volunteered to help. It was a lot of fun and it ended up being the last game of the season and the arena was PACKED! Plus USU won!!! It was a great weekend.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY BABE!!!

Here are some pictures of our room. Don't mind my dorky hubby. He kinda hammed it up for the pictures. Also the pictures were taken on my phone so they aren't very good. My camera batteries were dead and we were too lazy to run to the store to get some more.

This is a cool border made out of old playing cards.

That table was so tall!!! The barrel had a place at the top that held ice and they put some IBC Root Beer in there for us.

I told him to stand in front of the bed to show how tall it was. It had steps to get up to it. Eric at the last minute got distracted by something on the TV and turned his head. Typical man...

Now he is just hamming it up!

I don't know what he is doing in this picture. That pool table had a few mysterious white stains on it...what? I was just saying there was probably some beer or something spilled on it! Get your minds out of the gutter!!!

Valentine's Day

2009-02-10T15:01:00.003-07:00

In 4 days it will be Valentine's Day. This is a holiday I have always enjoyed because it's so fun to get chocolates and flowers, etc. This year Valentine's Day takes on a whole different feel/meaning. It is the day that our sweet Gunnar was due. Even though we will still celebrate it (because Rohbi would feel so bad if she didn't get her Valentine from us :) ) I have decided to use this day as a good way to honor our son. I haven't decided yet what I will do for sure but I am going to do some form of service. So I'm asking any of you who read this to please (if you think about it) do something nice for someone else. Some ideas might be to send a sick child who is in the hospital some flowers, buying lunch for the person behind you in the drive through, leave an extra large tip for your server if you're going out to dinner that day, etc. I know you all think I'm a little crazy or weird but this would really mean a lot to me. Anyway, now that you all think I'm crazy, I'll leave you alone.

I'm officially an "old lady"

2009-02-10T14:55:00.003-07:00

So I started taking knitting classes from a lady in my ward about 3 weeks ago and our first project was a wash cloth. A friend of mine called me today and asked me what I was doing and I told her I was knitting...she told me that I was too young to be doing that. So yes, I am officially an old lady!!! Anyway, I still haven't learned how to purl but here is my first project! (okay don't laugh at me...I was pretty proud of myself!)

I started a new blog...

2009-01-17T14:30:00.003-07:00

Just to let you know that I started another blog for my Scentsy business. I will post any specials that are going on and keep it updated with the Warmer and Scent of the Month. The url is http://scentsybyamber.blogspot.com/. Stop by and visit it.

Family Pictures!!!

2009-01-10T15:54:00.004-07:00

We went to Logan today and got our pictures taken at Kiddie Kandids! I think they turned out great other than I still look like a chunk! But that's okay. I'm still working on that lol.

Christmas Day

2008-12-26T10:30:00.003-07:00

Well, Santa made it to our house! After stuffing himself on Christmas Eve and not having any more room to take another bite, he still found room to take a bite or two of the cookies Rohbi made.

We had to wake her up. She looks pretty chipper for being so tired! I think she was pretty excited to open presents!

I took a ton of pictures but I'm pretty sure I would bore you with all of them so I only posted a few. I also ended up sick so wasn't in much of a mood to do a whole lot. Rohbi made out like a bandit! She got spoiled rotten! Her Grandma and Grandpa Gould sent us with some gifts they bought before they left for Wyoming. Her Grandma and Grandpa Bates mailed several gifts from Boise. Then of course she got the gifts from Santa and from Mom and Dad. Eric's mom and dad also sent Eric and I each wallets that we both love! Eric's sister sent us some popcorn which we will get to eventually, but after dealing with so much popcorn this year, I think she'll understand why we don't get to it right away. It looks yummy though and I know I will end up blowing my diet on it!!! Thanks Shelly! Thank you to everyone who sent us gifts! We loved them! Mom and Dad also gave us a carpet shampooer which I was so excited for! I've been borrowing Mom's so it's going to be so good to have our own! After we opened gifts and eating breakfast, we got ready and braved the storm to head down to Preston to enjoy the rest of our family. We stopped by Andrea and Jon's house to see what Ty and Britni and the twins got. I wanted to hold one of those beautiful little girls all day but where I was sick, I had to resist. I was so bummed because they both looked so cute and I wanted to hug on them. Oh well, I'll get plenty of time. After stopping at their house, we went over to Amy and Mark's house where we had our family Christmas party. We had a lot of fun eating food and stuffing ourselves. We opened gifts from each of the families and played games. The kids played downstairs. Thanks Amy for letting us invade your house and enjoy each other! Aubree and Jeff also braved the storm to make it and spend time with us! Aubree is going to have her beautiful little baby girl in about 3 1/2 weeks and she looks so cute all happy and pregnant! It was so much fun to spend time as a family!

Christmas Eve

2008-12-26T09:29:00.009-07:00

What a fun holiday! We had so much fun on Christmas Eve. First we went sledding. We started off with just Rohbi on the sled and Eric driving the 4-wheeler and me riding behind him.

Pretty soon Mom had to ride on the sled because I had to "help" Rohbi. Okay fine, I can't help it if I'm still a kid at heart! ;) I offered to drive so Eric could ride with her but I don't think he trusted my driving! After about 10 rounds of going up and down our driveway, we got bored and went to the fair grounds where we had a wide open field to play in.

Rohbi ended up with a lap and sled full of snow. She didn't want to stop!

Eric tried his darndest to dump us and only succeeded a few times. The last time he dumped us, I ended up with a face full of snow and the worst ice cream headache! As you can tell, I had makeup smeared all over my face by the time we were done. Oh well, we had fun!

She looks cold doesn't she! She did not want to stop! We had to finally tell her she had to come in so we could get ready to go over to Grandma and Granpa Larson's house for dinner.

We let her open some pj's and a book and then we read the book to her. It's called "On This Special Night" and it's a nativity story but it's from the animals' perspective. It was a cute book.

Then we came home and put in a batch of cookies for Santa.

We couldn't forget to feed Santa's reindeer. We mixed some oats with confetti. The oats to feed the reindeer and the confetti to shine and sparkle so they could find our house. We moved since last Christmas so we had to make sure they could find our house!

Christmas In Heaven

2008-12-19T23:31:00.005-07:00

I've been really struggling lately with losing Gunnar. I'm so excited for Christmas because I love this time of year but I've been dreading it at the same time. Christmas day will be the 3 month anniversary of us losing Gunnar. I miss him so much. Anyway, I was getting my visiting teaching lesson together and was looking for a Christmas poem to read to kind of incorporate Christmas into the lesson and I stumbled across this poem on the internet. I don't even remember the site I found it on but it is such a beautiful poem and I fell in love with it. Of course by the time I was finished reading it, I was bawling. But I thought I would share it.

Christmas In Heaven

I see the countless Christmas trees around the world below
with tiny lights like heaven's stars reflecting on the snow.

The sight is so spectacular please wipe away that tear
for I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year.

I hear the many Christmas songs that people hold so dear
but the sounds of music can't compare with the Christmas choir up here.

I have no words to tell you of the joy their voices bring
for it is beyond description to hear the angels sing.

I know how much you miss me, I see the pain inside your heart
for I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year.

I can't tell you of the splendor or the peace here in this place
Can you just imagine Christmas with our Savior face to face?

I'll ask him to lift your spirit as I tell you of your love so
then pray for one another as you lift your eyes above.

Please let your hearts be joyful and let your spirit sing
for I am spending Christmas in heaven and I'm walking with the King.

Wanda Bencke

My Mostly Homemade Tree

2008-12-19T23:11:00.007-07:00

Well we finally got our tree up and decorated! I had to make ornaments for the ward Christmas party so I didn't have a lot of time to get all mine done. By the time I was finished with the ones for the Christmas party, I was pretty much sick of seeing popcorn! So I did the minimal and left the other 2 or 3 boxes of bulbs for next year!

I made the angel.

Ya so I cheated and put tinsel in the bulb!

They turned out so cute!

Kinda blurry but oh well...

These ornaments aren't homemade but these are the ones we bought this year:

This is Gunnar's ornament. It says "When someone you love becomes a memory, that memory becomes a treasure"

Rohbi's ornament

"Our First Christmas 2008"

Ward Christmas Party

2008-12-19T23:03:00.002-07:00

The primary singing before Santa came

Eric and Rohbi waiting in line for Santa. Eric looks like he has a snowflake coming out of the middle of his face lol. Oh and he wanted to sit on Santa's lap too but figured he was too big. That didn't stop him from asking for a new gun! Typical cop!

Snowy Days

2008-12-19T22:32:00.004-07:00

Wow! I am such a slacker! I have so many pictures and haven't been on here to post them. We finally got a pretty good snow and Rohbi was itching to get outside and play in it! She had a ball!!!

She had to make tracks all over the yard

Snow angels

Making her snow castles

I'm going to add a few other pics of our view, etc.

From what we call our back door but it's actually the side of the house that faces the highway

This is shooting across the highway at the mountains on the East side of town

The "front" of the house facing the cows and the flume :)

Eric's "rig"

Happy Holidays!!!

2008-12-19T12:53:00.001-07:00

My favorite Christmas memories

2008-12-06T22:57:00.002-07:00

I was driving the other day and for some odd reason, I got to thinking about Christmas and my favorite Christmases and memories from Christmas. I thought I would post those and whoever reads this, I challenge you to think about it and write your favorite Christmas and/or memory.

My favorite Christmas was when I was about 5 or 6 years old. My parents work for the power company so we lived in company housing. We were at a babysitter's house but she lived close by too. We had some people working on our house, doing some electrical work and they had gone on a lunch break. My mom decided to go home for some reason on her lunch break. She came home to a house fire. She had gone in to get the animals out. I remember Mom coming over to the babysitter's house covered in black from the smoke. We lost most of our Christmas decorations and presents in the fire and didn't have a place to stay for Christmas. The power company has a place they call the Training Center which is a place people stay at for meetings. It has bedrooms, a kitchen, conference room, offices, etc. We ended up staying there for Christmas. I remember being so worried that Santa wouldn't know to stop there instead of our house for Christmas. That year we made our own ornaments which included stringing popcorn for garland. We also did a paper chain, etc. We had so much fun! We woke up to a bunch of presents and had a normal Christmas even though we didn't get a whole lot for Christmas. Our community banded together and gave us what they could which included presents and other stuff (I don't remember because it was so long ago). But the thing is that I don't really remember what I got that year for Christmas. I just remember that people did their best to help us have a Christmas and we had so much fun just making the ornaments and stuff.

Another favorite Christmas of mine was just after I had seperated from my first husband. It was kind of a rough time of year. I was alone with my daughter and I didn't have a lot of money to buy her presents. One night we were just sitting around when we heard a knock at the door. I opened the door but no one was there. I looked around and saw nothing but looked down and there was something (I can't remember for sure what it was but I think it was a plate of cookies or something). It had a cute little saying on it. I thought "Wow that was nice but I don't know who did this so I don't know who to thank." The next night, I came home and there was already something on our step. I didn't realize that this was going to be a nightly thing. I started getting excited for that knock every night. Pretty soon, I started getting a different little figurine from the nativity scene every night. There was always a cute little gift for Rohbi to open up too. She loved it! For the first few nights, I tried to catch whoever was knocking on my door but after a few times, I decided that I didn't want to ruin it for whoever was doing this. They were obviously having fun and wanted to keep it all anonymous. I started waiting about 30 seconds before I would answer the door. In the end, I ended up having a full nativity scene and something to look forward to on those lonely nights. I was so greatful for that. I have a few suspicions as to who it was but I don't know for sure. I had another experience that year that was neat but I won't go into detail on that. That year ended up being a great Christmas and it made the blow of a divorce not as bad.

Homemade Christmas (a little picture heavy so please bare with me)

2008-11-29T21:41:00.007-07:00

This year when I brought up to my husband that I needed to go buy some Christmas decorations, Rohbi piped in and said that we should make them this year so that is what we have decided to do. I love Christmas!!! Again, these decorations are another idea I stole from someone else. I'm not very creative. I'm not finished yet and I still have a lot of work to do. I'm also making the angel to go on the top of the tree but I haven't finished that one yet. I did buy a few decorations. When we were younger, my parents bought us collectible ornaments every year so this year I bought Rohbi one. I also bought one for Eric and I for our first Christmas together and one that says "When someone you love becomes a memory the memory becomes a treasure" and I bought that one for Gunnar, the baby we lost this September. Anyway, here are those decorations:

These ones I made out of applesauce, glue, and cinnamon. They smell so good! As you can tell, I'm not an artist so please just ignore the artwork! :)

These ones, I actually popped the popcorn inside of the ornaments and then I'm going to decorate them. Rohbi and I had a ball with these!

These you can't see very well but I just put tinsel inside of them. Pretty simple!

While I was at it, I decided to make as many gifts this year as I could. I'll post some of them but some of them I won't because they are gifts for people who might read this post. Anyway, here they are!

These are pictures of a calendar I'm going to put together for my mom and Rohbi's grandma Jean (on her dad's side). Again, I'm not even close to being an artist so ignore the artwork but we had a lot of fun with this. I got this idea from http://www.littlegiraffes.com/handprintcalendar.html.

I've also got a lot to do and I have a lot that are done but like I said, I'm afraid someone might read this post and see their gifts on here so I'm not posting a lot of them.

Edible turkeys

2008-11-29T21:34:00.004-07:00

First of all, I have to say that I hardly ever have an original creative idea. I usually have to copy someone else's ideas. Well, this was the case but I have to show you the cute little turkeys I made for Thanksgiving and put in front of everyone's plates. I was so excited! They were so easy and all edible!

Tagged

2008-11-29T21:16:00.005-07:00

Okay. I've been tagged by my friend Laura. I'm not creative or clever with these things either so just bare with me :)

Favorite color: I like a few of them. I love pink and brown together! I like blue and green too.

Favorite Movie: The Notebook

Favorite Christmas movie(I added this for the season): The Christmas Story

Bubble Gum: Watermelon

Sport: Cheerleading of course! lol just kidding...um...I guess I would have to say basketball

Favorite vacation: Europe! I loved it!

Book: I don't know if I have a favorite book but I like anything by Jennie Hansen, Stephanie Meyer, or Fern Michaels

Favorite Song: Can't say that I have a favorite song either but right now I like anything by Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood.

Picture: I don't have the disc here at this house but my favorite picture is the one of Rohbi on her first birthday. She has a really cute look on her face and she has cute little piggy tails in her hair. If I had to pick one to show you it would have to be at our wedding and it is of Eric holding my garder in his mouth.

Now I've got to pick 5 people to tag. I chose Charee, Heidi, Lacey, Jessie, and Tara.

Black Friday...

2008-11-28T02:42:00.003-07:00

First of all, happy late Thanksgiving everyone!!! So is anyone else as crazy as me and going shopping the day after Thanksgiving? My brother-in-law asked me if I was smoking crack...I think I am. It's 2:43 am and I'm getting ready to leave in about 17 minutes to meet the other girls I'm going shopping with. For any of you who know me very well, I'm not a morning person. I'm not that pleasant in the mornings. I'm running on about 2 hours of sleep because I couldn't sleep last night and finally forced myself to try to go to sleep last night. At this point, I don't know if lack of sleep is worth getting a few dollars worth of deals. We'll see I guess (if I don't get thrown in jail for beating some old lady over the head for the last Diamond Castle Barbie on the shelf). Well...wish me good luck. Maybe I'll be able to out run the cops! Just kidding. It should be interesting!

December Warmer and Scent of the Month

2008-11-27T09:30:00.004-07:00

December’s warmers of the month are the Cyprus and Malta warmers. They were designed to be reminiscent of beautiful Mediterranean cities. The rich, green of Cyprus is accented with gold highlights by using a reactive glaze. Malta, with its warm, gold undertones will bring a classic look of earthenware to your décor. These warmers you can get for $27.00 each, which is a 10% discount. I have the Cyprus warmer and I love it!!!

The scent of the month is Hearth & Home. They combined the aromatic spices of the season with sweet Bayberry. I’ve had it in my burner since I got it and I love it! These I am also offering at a 10% discount:

Car Candle-$2.70
Room Spray-$7.20
Scentsy Bar-$4.50
Scentsy Brick-$18.00

If you're interested, visit my website at http://www.scentsy.com/abates. If you have questions, feel free to call me at (208)221-3802.

Fun times!!!

2008-11-09T11:29:00.006-07:00

My friend, Nicole, got married on November 3. She had a "reception", I guess you could call it. last night. It's so great to see her happy again! She's been through a lot so it's good that she finally found a good guy who will make her happy and treat her the way she should be! So meet the new Mr. and Mrs. Rusty Mortenson!!!

They were trying to get them to dance together

They finally decided to dance

Rohbi, Abby (Rusty's daughter), and a cousin dancing

These two are quite the match! They had so much fun dancing together!

Time for a drink! It was so hot in there!

Oops! Abby dipped Rohbi and dropped her lol!

My Imaginative Daughter

2008-11-04T14:04:00.003-07:00

I came into our living room to find Rohbi doing this to our coffee table with her Bella Sara cards. This was her house and it had all the rooms and stuff. Her mind never turns off and she is always doing something. She has such an imagination and can play for hours by herself and comes up with the most creative ways to play!

Tada!!!

Halloween 2008 (a little picture heavy)

2008-11-04T13:32:00.006-07:00

This year Rohbi chose to be a Snow Princess and of course she lived up to her title. As you can see in the pictures she is quite the little diva :) But she did look very pretty in her outfit and she loved having makeup put on and how long her eye lashes looked!

(above) one of her "Top Model" looks

(above) another "Top Model" pose

at the Grace Elementary carnival

Cheeser!!!!!

She had to show off the pillow case her Grandma Bates made her!!!

Rohbi and Eric at the Trunk or Treat in Soda Springs. By the time this was over, Eric was ready to be done with Trick or Treating, but we convinced him to let us go to a few of the houses around Grace too since the Trunk or Treat was pretty pathetic this year!

As you can tell, I hate decorating so I did the minimal amount. We didn't have any trick or treaters anyway so there wasn't much of a point other than Rohbi would have been dissapointed! She had fun decorating and coloring and carving pumpkins. (the cat was free lol)

My pathetic pumpkins.....

This is one of the pumpkins lit up at night. It looked pretty cool!

I became a Scentsy Consultant

2008-10-29T14:19:00.010-06:00

I just became a Scentsy Consultant. Scentsy is a wickless candle and has the most wonderful scents to burn. I'm new and not a very good sales person so we'll see how it goes. Eric isn't completely sold on this idea and wasn't very happy about me starting this up so I have to prove to him that it's worth the money I spent to start this up. THIS SHOULD BE INTERESTING :) I have decided to take this a step further and donate 10% of everything I make to SHARE Parents. SHARE Parents is a nonprofit organization so they rely on donations. They are the people who came to the hospital when we lost Gunnar and took pictures of him, took molds of his hands and feet, took hand and foot prints, gaves a "birth/death certificate", clothed and got him ready for us to see him, put together a memory box with some pictures, a disc with all pictures they took, a tiny gold ring to put on a chain, a little teddy bear, and all the clothes and blankets they put him in when we got to see him. If any of you are interested in buying Scentsy products, please feel free to visit my website at https://www.scentsy.com/abates.